It finally happened. The moment that every bride (and every groom) dreads. You think you can avoid it. You try to ignore the signs. But eventually, no matter how hard you fight it, you fall victim to it’s merciless grasp.
Yes, I experienced the dreaded Bridal Meltdown. The whole, fabled, cliche shebang. There was crying. There was yelling. There was the dramatic, “ohmygod this isn’t right, what are we doing?” and the hyperbolic, “this is the worst thing ever, we’re never going to get married and everything is going to be terrible for the rest of our lives!” I think at some point I even threatened to run away to Mexico and told Tim if he wanted to get married he was going to have to follow me there with a mariachi band in tow.
She’s definitely running towards a margarita.
To be completely fair, I’m not even sure what tipped off my meltdown. Maybe it was the fact that I come home from work every night to an inbox full of wedding vendor emails who all need immediate attention. Maybe it’s the fact that we haven’t written our ceremony. Or the ever-evolving guest list. Perhaps it’s because every time I run into someone I know, they say “Oooooh how’s wedding planning going? Only two months left! You must have it all figured out by now.” Who knows. Maybe I was just really tired and maybe had one too many glasses of wine at dinner. Regardless of the cause, I finally snapped.
Even though I’m sure you’d be thrilled to hear all the juicy details, this isn’t going to be about how I had a horrific meltdown. More importantly, it’s about how I had, and survived, a horrific meltdown.
Four ways to bounce back from The Bridal Meltdown that don’t involve a pint of Ben and Jerry’s and Titanic (however neither of those things would hurt):
1) Get organized
. Seriously. Random, ungrounded, floating wedding ideas and to-do’s are a Bridal Meltdowns most potent fuel. At some point your brain is going to explode with wedding-related thoughts and you won’t be able to remember any of your grand ideas. This doesn’t have to be anything to revolutionary. For me, it was finally having the sense to label my e-mails. I gave everything a category so I can find it fast. Wedding reading? Boom! It’s labeled under “ceremony” (creative, I know). Need a place to house all of those lovely wedding inspiration photos? Then I believe it’s time for your newest addiction: Pinterest
. I’m pretty disappointed that I didn’t know about this when I was in the earlier stages of planning. It’s absolutely genius.
2) Give it a rest, already. If you had a meltdown, that means it’s time to get rid of some WIP (wedding industry pressure). For me, this meant (gasp!) unsubscribing from the majority of my wedding blogs. I realized that I’d been spending hours a day reading wedding blogs out of pure obligation even though my wedding is mainly planned. Give yourself permission to only read what you’re actually interested in (and now watch my readership plummet to one. Hi mom!)
3) Stop procrastinating, you lazy bum. You know exactly what I’m talking about. Just send in the dang makeup deposit that’s been sitting on your kitchen counter for a week. Return the e-mail from the wedding coordinator that you keep “forgetting” about. Ignoring your wedding stress won’t make it go away. But the sooner you do it, the sooner it’s done.
4) Make a mental highlight reel. I’ve been way too quick to forget the fun moments of this process. My favorites so far? Cake tasting (yum), engagement photos (quirky, silly awesomeness), dress shopping with my mom and sister and picking out wedding rings with my handsome fiance. What have your favorite moments been? Take a minute to remember them.
If all else fails, just go ahead and find that DVR recording you kept of Kim Kardashian’s wedding special. That will make just about anyone feel better about themselves. At least you can revel in the knowledge that you might be going crazy, but you will never be as crazy as that family.
And it never hurts to blow off some steam.
And as for me? I actually feel better than I have in months. My meltdown put things into perspective and has allowed me to start having fun wedding planning again. Sometimes it takes a moment of crazy to make you feel truly sane.