Hurl! Me
By Andrew Zimmern
Has anyone seen Hurl! ? If you haven’t, you ought to sooner rather than later because I don’t expect it to last very long. But maybe I am giving reality food TV audiences too much credit. Hurl!, an extreme eating contest that just debuted on cable channel G4, has a simple premise: Contestants try to eat as much as they can in one sitting, and then they get up and immediately follow that chow session with some rigorous physical endeavor. Whoever eats the most and vomits the least wins the big money.
It is like the idea behind the original Rollerball, the ’70s movie starring James Caan. I say we cut to the chase and just have the players eat forty pounds of tuna-salad sandwiches and, despite their mothers’ plaintive advice, go swimming in a heavy rip tide off the Carolinas. That’s good TV.
****
Speaking of which . . . I am huge Deadliest Catch fan. Having met and hung out with the boat captains at several network functions throughout the years, I have a connection to the show that keeps me on the edge of my seat even during the dud episodes. But last night, I got the treat of a lifetime right here in the Twin Cities. The Oceanaire Seafood Room sent its chef, Rick Kimmes, up to Alaska last year where he made some friends in the crab business. This year, he bought more than 120,000 pounds of fresh—yes, fresh—king crab legs from the crew of the Time Bandit. Get ’em while they last. I cannot stand frozen king crab; they are lifeless, waterlogged, and taste like chemicals. But the fresh stuff is amazing, and you don’t have to fly to NYC and buy a whole live king in Chinatown (check out Fu Leen if you care to) to get a nibble of the primo crab; all you have to do is head over to the Hyatt.
****
Speaking of the Hyatt . . . that hotel is desperate need of a makeover. It looks downright beaten up and cheap. Now that Manny’s is moving to the Foshay, how long before Oceanaire gets out of that building? My guess is pretty darn fast . . .
****
By the way, as the State Fair approaches, I wanted to remind folks that the controversy at the Activities Building has spawned unwarranted ‘police action’ as far as I am concerned. Cooks who for years were deemed amateurs are now considered professionals. People such as Marjorie Johnson and John Lerma have been politely told not to bother entering contests this year; they are disqualified. FOR SHAME!
First, the rules are unevenly applied since there are many sweepstakes winners who enter and are not disqualified simply because they have not written a book. Second, the Fair folks have taken all the fun out of the pro-am nature of a cooking contest. If you feel the same way, let them hear it this year while you are out at the Great Minnesota Get-Together.
© 2008 MSP Communications, Inc. All rights reserved
Oh please, save your huffing and puffing for something better. Look I love Marjorie, adore her, think she's a riot, hang on her every appearance but she is NOT an amateur cook. And it's not just the book. She makes numerous TV apperances, she teaches a ton of cooking classes,(for ALL of which she gets paid) let's just be honest and say she's a pro. Are the rules being unfairly applied concerning others? Maybe, but sorry, the Marjorie call is a no brainer. If you're not going to at least make the easy calls you might as will just throw out the catagories completely.
Posted by: Kelly Red on July 30, 2008 at 12:31 PM
Oh please, if every old lady who raised her family on home cooked (and baked) meals rather than McDonald's drive thru's, were considered professionals, there would be more restaurants, cafes and coffee shops in the Twin Cities than there are already. Getting a culinary degree, demonstrating how to bake, and being friends with Rosie O'Donnell does not a professional necessarily make. Moreover, there is thrill in competing against "professionals" like Marjorie.
Posted by: Marina on July 31, 2008 at 8:10 AM
But I guess the question is: what makes a professional chef or baker? That is obviously something the fair is struggling with. I don't think it's the person who wins one sweepstakes for their "better with butter" recipe, nor the person who makes the occassional TV appearence. I don't even think it's a culinary degree, cripes anyone with the spare time and the money can get one of those. So what is it? And where and when did dear Marjorie cross the line? After her 10th TV appearence, or her 100th? When she went national and not just the Steve and Sharon show (I'm showing my age with that comment)? After a published book? And wouldn't it be just as exciting to go up against Marjorie in the Pro-Am if she was the pro? I am not in any way bad mouthing her, like I said I LOVE the woman. She's such an institution I wonder if it hasn't become a little unfair for her to be "Amateur" considering all her extracuriculer activities. Oh, and for the record, I have never entered a baking contest in my life, so it's not bitterness at never beating her. LOL.
Posted by: Kelly Red on July 31, 2008 at 12:47 PM
the two of you make all the right points. the rules are too gray to be applied evenly, and at what point does someone become a pro??? the easy solution, and the fun one for all involved is to open it up to call comers. How cool is it for my grandma to send in cookies judged in the same contest as Michelle Gayer for instance? i know 10 non professionals whose BBQ sauce is better than anything served in a restaurant by a chef! i think the Fair Folks are nuts to limit their contests....
Posted by: Andrew Zimmern on July 31, 2008 at 1:29 PM
I had the Time Bandit king crab from Oceanaire in April. There is, I believe, a $10/lb. premium over their standard king legs. The flavor was amazing; not like any crab I have ever had. No drawn butter needed.
To steal an idea from a previous blog topic, I would love to see Oceanaire move to the former Goodfellows location on 7th.
Posted by: Dante on July 31, 2008 at 1:54 PM
I'm a judge at the talent show and they deal with similar issues. (I think if one makes half of their income from what they do they are considered a professional in the talent world.) But it would be a shame to not have Marjorie in the contest, just for the fact that she brings so much excitement to the building. If anything she's a "Professional State Fair Contest contestant," if such a thing could be said. She got her start there with GL (I think) and it was due to those blue ribbons.
Posted by: rob barrett on July 31, 2008 at 2:24 PM
I think there's a distinction to be made between Marjorie and Lerma. Doesn't Lerma refer to hemself as a "chef" in most instances? I'm thinking he thinks he's a professional, whereas Marjorie is just a sweet hometown girl...
Posted by: Kris on August 1, 2008 at 2:24 PM
My brother used to enter the State Fair baking contest every single year. One year, he overheard some of the judges cataloging Marjorie's entries: "That's Marjorie's apple pie" and "Over there, those are Marjorie's brownies." Once he knew what he was looking for--some distinctive presentation techniques that set apart Marjorie's baked good from other entrants, such as certain patterns cut into the top of a pie--he duplicated her brownie presentation the very next year. AND WON. Even the judges seemed "surprised." Maybe because they believed they had awarded top honors to their perennial winner??? After that, he's never bothered to enter State Fair baking contest again.
His issue wasn't Marjorie. It was the judges. He entered these contests for the competition. Bring on the best. He felt he could hold his own in an unbiased judging--and had won many 2nd, 3rd and honorable mention awards that would seem to support his confidence. But when the judges have become so familiar with one entrant's style that they look for it year after year and don't give other contestants a chance, that's no longer fair. It should be about the quality of the food, not the name attached to it. Even world-class chefs have off days.
What a shame that the judges didn't address the real problem but took the easy way out by barring some from competing. I think a home cook or pastry chef would get an even bigger thrill from knowing they won against someone who's known and respected in the field or cooking or baking, whether pro or amateur.
Posted by: Janet Robles on August 1, 2008 at 3:26 PM
The situation at the State Fair is just the American way. It's how we do things here, mediocre. If anyone is excelling or doing better then someone else then the rules need to change. We don't want real competition because that would make people work harder and think.
My church does a Salsa contest every year and the first time I entered it I lost. So I talked to the people who tasted it, tasted the winning Salsa. Went back and tried again the next year. That time I came in second. So then I worked on it some more and finally the 3rd year I won. I won not because the best at my church was forced out, but because I had worked hard and kept trying and it made the win so much better.
Posted by: Melinda on August 1, 2008 at 3:51 PM
Hey Andrew!!!!!!! check out my website www.kstuff.wordpress.com comment on it !!!!!!!!
Posted by: connar on August 3, 2008 at 2:44 PM
Two off topics...
1). AZ, I miss your recipe posts. I know you are busy - but those were always a treat. Loved the gravlax recipe. Hope you consider tossing some more out there soon.
2). I heard Alex is in some stage of getting another Brasa to open up on Grand Ave. Have you heard anything to that effect?
Posted by: Phil on August 4, 2008 at 11:14 AM
Once he knew what he was looking for--some distinctive presentation techniques that set apart Marjorie's baked good from other entrants, such as certain patterns cut into the top of a pie--he duplicated her brownie presentation the very next year. AND WON. Even the judges seemed "surprised."
Posted by: Mark on September 14, 2008 at 4:16 AM
My church does a Salsa contest every year and the first time I entered it I lost. So I talked to the people who tasted it, tasted the winning Salsa. Went back and tried again the next year. That time I came in second. So then I worked on it some more and finally the 3rd year I won. I won not because the best at my church was forced out, but because I had worked hard and kept trying and it made the win so much better.
Posted by: Mark on September 14, 2008 at 4:23 AM